grief
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On nights when I toss and turn. There are no cold sides left on my pillow, I imagine I’m a maiden that’s been sent off across the sizzling pink pond. I imagine they sent me here to find a better life. I force my heart to believe mothers sending me letters, I just can’t receive. …
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There was a timeI dreamed of having a stalker.You know, Someone who really took an interest in me. A man willing to wait outside buildings with a baseball bat to scare off anyone who thought they’d have my hand. How endearing, I used to think. Lurking in the shadowsMemorizing every inch of my existenceWaiting for…
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Fingernails clipped with chattering teethRed bumps protrude from a scabbed and blotchy face. Hair frizzed and fraying at the half blond ends. She peers into her reflection, Do homes exist without the sting of humiliation dancing on liquored up lips?She is uncertain. She knows she cannot roam their hallowed halls anymore, The gallows, a couch…
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In her attic, hot with sweat I look up at her desk. The prettiest gel pens rolling around. Stamps Falling out of drawers Ink packs stacked too highFlowers pressed on paper Shimmering in the small lamp light A smile lit up her face whenever we were hereI never understood How they said she was cruel…
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Do not fear They demanded of us. From the moment I can remember,The world was scary. There’s something out there,They told us. He’s here to save us. All this fear, it’s lying to youTrust in that thing out there. They’d insist. Lay your fear aside Everything that’s scary,It really isn’t real. it’s all a faithless…
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When the sunshine comes Be sure your mouth is open. When your mouth is openBe sure to eat it. When you eat ItBe sure you taste it. And when you taste it Be sure to remember it.
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On the merry go roundShe let her hair down Pushing her harderHands held tight Eyes strained upSpinning in space Wind whipping locks out of placeSewn into her smiling face So dizzy, she became But still They spin her round Metal, hot to the touch Sizzling tender thighs Fingers getting tired Fearing she’ll fly into spaceThey…
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sat on the side of her white tile bathtub,mouth open widein went the soap acid on my tongue. what had I said? I can’t remember now. but that rancid taste, her steaming angry face imprinted forever in my mind. it’s just odd it happened twice . in that haunted red house. first when I…
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My palms pound the headboard Searching for the source of buzzingRattling me awake.Another lucid dream sent to live in rifts around my psyche,I bat my eyes and press my feet to the carpet. I reflect on the moment the ship was going down“Where are the life jackets?” I scream at my dad as he dove…
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Bubbles running to the surface. Light blurry from above. Rainbows shimmer up the walls. I beg to see just one more rainbowPlastered across the rippling sky. One more chance to find my lot in life. Underneath the ocean’s surface The quiet lets my thoughts swim near,And way down there, my mind becomes clear.Holding my breath…
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The panic bunny kicks my chest. Will it explode? I’m reminded again today That even I will die. Eyes transfixed on the cloud, walking by,silently, I beg her to tell me her secret. This life, How do I keep it? My foolish mind pleaded. Grappling with the universe. A puffy smile looks down at me,…
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What if the sun led us astray? She hurtles through space, carrying us on her back. Does she know how we depend on her each moment of forever. When she sends out the flares that swamp our magnetic fields, is it to say she knows we’ve set ourselves ablaze? All she has brought to life,…
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Churning eats the bottom of my stomach. My feet drag across the carpet floor. Denial rots a top my teeth. Don’t check the phone,they still haven’t called. A disappointment I grow weary of feeling. Shaking it off, I exit the shower. Would I even answer if they rang?Wiping away the morning of mourning. Onward, with…
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What makes the pain go away? When I lay my father down to rest, I won’t be concerned with the worst of his crimes. Yet, for years, his sins kept me awake each night. And still, his choices keep me away.Am I sad for all he’s done, or am I sad for all that I’ve…
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I do not chase a life Free from pain I pursue knowing it will be okayI chase the knowledge That no pain is too big For me to endureBecause I have grown the strength to withstand the raging storms.
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My eyes squint, lips quiver. Don’t look at me.The flood gates open, Goop slides out my nose. The churning stops my breakfast from going down I rev my engine, I’m on the run Get away from me I cover my mouth,bile’s about to blow Brown locks whip wet pink cheeks,The ache of hearts incinerated sets…
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What happens after my last breath? I ask myself for the thousandth time. Hair prickles, Palms sweat. I chew the end off my thumb nail. Stomach churns, I don’t know. What will it feel like? The beat of thumping in my chest growing louder, A concert just for me. I close my eyes tight All…
Healing Birds Fly Again 